Hallucinogenic fungi have been found springing up in no other than the Queen’s garden at Buckingham Palace, after being identified by gardening expert Alan Titchmarsh.

hallucinogens

TV presenter excavated the fungi at Buckingham Palace for an ITV gardening show. Alan Titchmarsh recognised the red and white toadstool as he was on his tour of the secluded 40 acre plot. If consumed, it’s known for it’s extremely hallucinogenic effects, however, it also makes people who eat it extremely ill.

Buckingham Palace

The old fashioned thing was to feed the mushrooms to the village idiot, and then to drink his urine because then you would get all the high without any of the sickness.

For the avoidance of uncertainty, fungi from the garden are not used in the palace kitchens, however, it would be so easy not to resist the odd poke here and there just for fun. Comics are going to whizz into this article and centre their rhetoric upon the public, and there will be no censorship of what they articulate.

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Alan Titchmarsh has exhausted twelve months researching how the Palace garden alters with the seasons, and we will be experiencing the finishing calendar year with a Christmas tree mounted in the Marble Hall, adorned with holly and mistletoe from the royal garden, which will be festooned with festive golden crowns of magic mushrooms… just joking of course about the mushrooms!

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